GIF pics with funny captions

This string of mostly animated gifs, shared by a Sukbar eel, come with some funny captions. The English translation, however, may not be 100% foolproof as the meaning of some Chinese phrases are hard to capture in English, so my apologies if there are some parts not well-translated and if you don’t understand.

Starting from this pic, looking at his face outline causes loss of blood.
[note: I think ‘blood loss’ is associated with nose bleed etc and is used to describe what happens when someone is hot.]
这线条,失血，先从这一张开始。

Throwing a glance behind you is enough to seduce me, not to mention another electrifying wink…
回眸你都够我呛了，再放个电。。

What are you drinking? Doesn’t look like wine. MS miracle water? Your skin is so, so good…
这喝的是么呀？~ 不像酒。MS神仙水？皮肤闹木闹木好呢。。

I know you are conducting the frequency of our screams
知道你在指挥我们尖叫的频率。。。。

You look so good despite the big laugh
大妈笑也闹木闹木好看的说。。。

Our mature man also has a childish side. Little friend, which grade are you in? Are your parents here to fetch you? Do you need Auntie (me) to send you home? Ha!
我们成熟的男人也有孩子气的一面。。小盆友你几年级 了呀？有家长接吗？要不要阿姨送你哇。。

Even sneaking a look is of such a high standard !~
偷看都偷得那么有水准。。。！~

The most charming man in history to make pickled vegetables. Do it well, eels want to eat it together with rice. Quickly, quickly
史上最迷人的做泡菜的男人，好好做，鳗鱼们还要拿来配饭呢。BAI LI BAI LI

The role of a murder suspect does not suit you, but where else can you find such a handsome suspect besides you?
杀人嫌疑犯不适合你演，，不过N个闹木帅的嫌犯，，舍你其谁呀。。。

Millions of men in the world, each with their unique character, but how to describe you? You have elegance, you are handsome, you are trendy, you are cute, you are pretty, you are tall, you are even cheerful!~
世上男人千千万。。各有各的特点。。可是怎么形容你呢？~优雅你有、帅气你有、时尚你有、可爱你有、漂亮你有、高大你有……开朗的性格你都占了！~

Wait for us, we will be there immediately. You requested for it, we did not say anything *cough cough*
等着我们，我们马上到。是你要求的，我们可什么没说袄，什么也没说。。。咳咳。

Can you use that magical finger to move our big eel pool instantaneously to your side?
内个有魔力的手指，，能不能把我们鳗鱼群大面积的瞬移到你面前呀。。QIE BAI

You’re not happy unless it’s revealing, right? Hee hee…
小样，不露不欢是吧！~嘿嘿。。

You can make a bestial expression look so handsome, not many in the world can do this. Everyone is afraid of being molested, but everyone here competes to be your victim
禽兽表情做的这么帅的。。世上有几人呀！~世人都怕被侵 犯，到这全都抢着成为受害者。。。。

Come come come, queue behind the computer. I especially reserve the space for you, it’s ok you are not on the first page
来来来来，快来电脑后面排队。我特意留的，，第一页没占上没关系。。。

In future, your tears can only be permitted to flow during acting. My star, I give my entire happiness to you, so you are not allowed to shed a tear unless it is a crying scene
以后眼泪只准在剧中流。。我的星星，我的快乐全部给你，所以除了哭戏之外，不许流一滴眼泪

You try so hard to promote your official website, I feel embarrassed if I do not join. Wait for me to join, I am waiting anxiously for approval of access. Throw more fish bait.
那么卖力的宣传官网，我再不入，就太不够意思了，你就等着我的大驾吧，还有苦苦等待开通中呀。！~多丢点鱼饵哈。

One minute, 3 minutes, one hour, so long as I can see you, you can take your time to stay in bed
一分钟，三分钟，一个小时，只要能看到你，你赖床多长时间都行

I am losing blood at the second pic in this series
这个系列的，我真的发第二张就不行了。。。失血。。

Our king when it comes to the waist, completely satisfactory all the way, haha…
WULI滴腰KING。。大满足滴我。。。哈哈。。一路YIN 到底。。

Yuppie Jang, the bottom of your shoe is very clean…
痞子张，你鞋底很干净的嘛。。。

Hey hey boy, what are you doing? Playing such high stakes to the point of no return. Haha…
喂喂小子，你在做什么，玩大了吧，回不去了吧。。哈哈。。

This this… I’m out of words. Please, can you not tempt me? This easily results in gastric bleeding, thanks for the selfless sacrifice
这个这个，有种无力感。拜托你能不能别这么勾引我成吗！~ 这个真的很容易胃出血，，感谢蛮的无私奉献。

Dry lips, moisten them? Look at how thin y ou are, do eat more meat
嘴唇干。。润润？看把你瘦的。。多吃点肉肉吧。。

This is good, this is good, how did you do that? Nothing is impossible to our King Suk
这个好这个好，怎么做到的。。。。我们的硕帝无所不能哈。。。

What’s that? Guitar is in my home. Come come.
内啥，吉它在我家。。来来来

The last pic for today, let us enter dreamland with JKS. Haha, bedtime.
今天的最后一张图，，让我们和小帅一起进入梦乡吧。。哈哈，觉觉去。。

Finally, let me put up one more pic! JKS, you know what I want to say, so I save 178 words
最后的最后，蛮还让我再贴一张！~张根硕XI。你知道我想说什么，此处省略178个字。。

I’m alert again, so uploading pics for another 10 minutes
话说我又精神了。。。再贴个十分钟。。。

Words saved here
此处省略………………

Haha, who is here, who is here
哈哈，谁来了谁来了。。。。。

I know you did not wear…. I’m not YY. Really
我知道没穿，，我没YY。真的。。

Credits: 木槿淡然 @ Baidusukbar